Everyone Will Let You Down

I'm going to share a current frustration with you: myself and everyone I know keep trusting humans.We are relying on each other for happiness and fulfillment, to inevitably get let down again and again. My Facebook news feed is filled with these stories; Friend X posts a status about how amazing Y is and  they are the best friend ever, oh so loving, etc., only for the friendship to be broken up and passive-aggressive statuses to be seen a week later. Rinse and repeat. The problem is that apart from Christ, we cannot love.

If you are not a Christian and you're reading this, you're ready to throw tomatoes. If you are saved, you may feel the same way. The statement that those outside of Christ cannot love is admittedly controversial, to say the least, because everyone thinks that they or their non-Christian friends love each other, and it's obviously offensive to claim otherwise. Now if you aren't a Christian, the Bible itself needs its own proving (I'd be glad to help you with that if you contact me), but my intent is to show you and Christian readers what it says about the ability to love, as I think our culture has some misconceptions on the issue.

 I'll start with the general idea (and you'll come to find out my favorite to teach about), humans are evil; I'll be honest, I think it is central to a lot of the issues in today's world. Paul lays it out well in Romans 3, quoting various passages of Psalms.

    “None is righteous, no, not one;
        no one understands;
        no one seeks for God.
    All have turned aside; together they have become worthless;
        no one does good,
        not even one.”
    “Their throat is an open grave;
        they use their tongues to deceive.”
    “The venom of asps is under their lips.”
        “Their mouth is full of curses and bitterness.”
    “Their feet are swift to shed blood;
        in their paths are ruin and misery,
    and the way of peace they have not known.”
        “There is no fear of God before their eyes.”
(Romans 3:10b-18)

It's a reoccurring theme, seen again in Romans 8:7-8: For* the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot please God. If you accept that God is good, then not following God is intuitively the antithesis of good, or evil. One cannot seek the flesh, or selfish desires, and God's good and perfect will. This would be like a soldier fighting on the front lines for both sides in a war. It is impossible to fully serve either side.

So, in general, humans are of an evil nature. This follows logically to prove that they are incapable of love. Simply, love is good so the evil are incapable of partaking in it. It is displayed in the Bible multiple places, one such being 1 John 4:7-8: Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. What this is saying is without a connection to God (being saved by Jesus' sacrifice and being sealed with His Spirit), one cannot love. Like a cord cannot carry electricity apart from the outlet or vessels cannot carry blood if disconnected from the heart. God is not just the source of love, he is love. So being disconnected from him, is a disconnection from love.

Now those who disagree with my claim will respond with something along the lines of "but my non-Christian friends love me" or "I am not a Christian and love my friends." I think a key to understanding this is the difference between what we have decided is love, and what the Bible is referring to here. What we see as love is a societal norm, or a means to a selfish end. I do it all the time: I show someone kindness as a bartering tool or because I'm supposed to, not selflessly as the Spirit would have me do. So you see I admit that Christians are not perfect in this and we still "love" by the world's standard when we do not let our Helper, the Holy Spirit, work through us.

There is still the question of why someone who is not saved can make others feel loved, but this post is long and accomplished it's original goal. I will continue that discussion sometime this week. Please comment with disagreements so I may address them in that post as well.


*Whenever you see "for" or "therefore" starting a verse, it means that there is an argument before this verse affecting the one you are reading. It is easy to take these things out of context, so always make sure the verse or passage is being used correctly, according to the surrounding text (even if it's being used by me).

We Stand Like A Bombed Out Building

So I restarted this blog to shift focus from my summer working for CIY to what God has taught/is teaching me. Those who are saved by his grace and sealed with the Holy Spirit are continuously being sanctified (i.e. being made perfect, Christ-like) through the Spirit, and that includes me. One thing I have never been good at is living like the church is Christ's body and bride (Romans 12:3-5; Ephesians 5:31-32). I have been taught numerous ways to "love my brothers and sisters," to "reach out the the rest of the body," and more recently, a new one, "love in faith" so that I know I don't need to feel anything toward anyone to show them love. I am still pompous and arrogant.

I know it's dangerous exposing my sin like this because, like James 3:1 says, "...we who teach will be judged with greater strictness." I consider myself a teacher, in some regards, so this verse scares me, especially because how I see this blog running is that it's filled with things I'm learning (read: things I'm failing at). And if I admit to any reader who stumbles upon this that I fail at loving them, why should they listen to any wisdom God gives me?

My comfort lies in the fact that I am evil. Yeah, you read that right. I am a sinner and I only want to sin, without God's help. However, God has changed my heart enough for me to accept his gift of grace through Jesus' death and be sealed with the Holy Spirit, as I mentioned earlier. So through God's Spirit, I can love my brothers and sisters, but I cannot on my own.

For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God's law; indeed, it cannot. Those who are in the flesh cannot please God.
You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not belong to him. But if Christ is in you, although the body is dead because of sin, the Spirit is life because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.
(Romans 8:7-11 ESV)

This is what I'm learning, always and until the day all is restored and I am fully sanctified through the Spirit. Currently, it applies to my inability to love. I cannot love alone, I need Christ in me to love for me, and to give up my selfish ambitions of seeming cool or above it all. Generally, it applies to every sin and lack of righteousness in my life. If this blog continues, you will get tired of hearing it, but will always need to: we are sinners and the only good in us is Christ, if we are saved.

Giving Up

So often in life, we are told to never give up. It's a sign of weakness, immaturity, and foolishness. We are supposed to push and push until we can't push anymore, then keep pushing. The idea is to dig deep inside of ourselves, "knowing" that we are strong and able to do anything we set our minds to. I'm learning to give up.

I am a firm believer in the idea of "total depravity." This means that we, as the human race, are evil from birth and born into sin, seeking our own gain and momentary pleasure. Genesis 6:5 says "The LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intention of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually." This shows that every intention we have is evil, from the early days of our existence (ever since the fall, or original sin), and Romans 3:12 agrees, declaring that "all have turned aside; together they have become worthless; / no one does good, / not even one." Nothing we can do pleases God or is righteous. Nothing we can do is worth anything. Uplifting stuff, huh?

The great thing about God's word is that it is filled with this seemingly depressing truth, but as a way of giving us hope. Without understanding we are sinful and worthless, and our "days pass away like smoke" (Psalm 102:3a), we can't understand how amazing God and his power are, or much less our necessity for him. But with this knowledge, knowing that there is nothing inside of us that is good, no matter how deep we dig or how much we push we can never live up to God's righteous standard or do anything qualified as good, we can find freedom from this in the Holy Spirit and finally accomplish the good works the Lord has prepared for us (Ephesians 2:10).

So with this background, I've been learning how to stop pushing, stop digging deep, and to give up. I consistently and daily forget I am unable to do anything alone. I try to lead Joelle and our relationship alone. I try to give advice alone. I try to grow closer to our Father alone. It's foolishness and it never works.

In fact, this past week I went through spells of feeling inexplicably sad. I spent these times wondering how I could feel better. Maybe if Joelle said the right thing, or I bought myself something fun, or if I was outright with it enough someone may feel sorry for me and fix it. The whole time I felt the Spirit prompting me to trust my Father, knowing he is sovereign and will work this for my good (the meaning of which is a whole other post I could write). But I refused at first, armed with my foam sword of mentalities that I just need to dig deep, push push push.

Having failed in my foolishness, I'm learning to give up. I'll never fully understand how, and until Jesus returns and everything is made complete I won't be fully sanctified, but I'm learning a little more now. I'm understanding more than ever I'm an evil human, whose only ability for good and sanctification is the Holy Spirit I've been sealed with by my faith in Christ and the Father's grace.